To video share or not; that is a question.

My husband and I were watching a movie where a character pulled out a blow up doll, naturally and out of curiosity I asked my husband if he had ever had sex with a blow up doll “nope” and he asked “have you? Do you want one?” I giggled and told him I had seen a video once of a girl with one but it is not something I am interested in doing. What is really great is this is how casual we talk about sex with each other. Some conversation are not so casual and come up because we are about to embark on a sexual adventure together but I feel very confident that if done well and the timing is right I can approach him with anything.

My husband is taking an ‘out of sight out of mind’ approach to my having a lover and having always been monogamous I understand that for him this is his choice on how he is willing to accommodate me, but I have always been Poly and this is my first marriage let alone ‘monogamous’ relationship so naturally I am having trouble being completely out of sight. I am not used to hiding things and not openly allowing my lover to benefit our marital union. I do not feel bad, guilty, or as though I am hiding, it just feels out of sorts for me but as you can see it is not keeping me from having a lover.

I pride myself on being very creative, in and out of the bedroom and believe that together my husband and I could pretty much conquer the planet so the idea came into my head a couple of weeks ago ‘would my husband be interested in video of my encounters’. My husband is not cuckold so he has never sat back and simply been voyeur to my sexual gratification he has always been very much involved. However I remembered something he once told me that ‘the imagination is often far worse than the reality’ and I wondered if a video option would not put his mind at ease. I wonder if the Cuckold activity would make him uneasy and worse of all would I be hurting his feelings if he has said all he is going to say on the matter.

As a couple and individually we enjoy homemade movies, he has a few around the house of him and ex-lovers, there are only a two of us but when watching pornography we do enjoy peeking in on the sex lives of others. I like the reality, the grittier video clips, the accidents, laughing and the sounds of people fucking but I do love to watch a woman enjoy her sexual partners. I know when my husband and I have had couples over or threesomes that he has always been proud of me; not in an offensive way but the way anyone would be if their prized horse won the race. We have always been proud of ourselves for once again accomplishing something together, a fantasy, and not blowing ourselves up in the process.

The idea came to me out of love not to hurt or somehow subject him to ridicule and of course my Poly brain might be trying to find a way to involve him, to ease his mind so that his imagination doesn’t take over and think up the worst. Would a video option present him with a visual that this guy is a sexual hobby and goes home when I am done? That I do respect our rules and this man is not in our bed? Can someone tell the difference between fucking and the sex people in love have? Would it turn him on? Would he give me ideas or maybe ask for little subtle things that I could do in the video only for him? Like a secret coded message!

A fair question is ‘would I want to see a video of my man fucking another woman’ and I cannot lie and say I haven’t, I have watched him fuck other women but I have also been in the room. How would I feel coming home to find a video for me waiting? A woman on my couch wrapped around my cock? How would I feel hearing her enjoy the pleasures I wasn’t there for?  If I am honest and do a ‘panty check’ right now, I did not start off sexually stimulated writing this entry but I am now. He gets this wonderful precum that… it’s just wonderful to see in video drip but even better to experience.

I would watch but then I would want to fuck his brains out right away.

 

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