Does boredom beget whoredom?

Do you ever find yourself considering doing something you normally would not simply because you are bored?

I find it a sad statement of our current human condition that we cannot simply exist, in silence, without motion for any given period of time: we must constantly be entertained. I was once told that sometimes doing nothing is the best plan and I believe it. We seem to be taken with the idea that we have a right to things that truly are not needed to survive but rather distractions we believe will make us happy.

Nowhere is it written that all of us are entitled to happiness, every minute of every day, every day but if a human being cannot tolerate being alone with himself how is it anyone else is expected to suffer their company?

What is boredom? Is it not natural to experience under stimulation now and then? Why do we venture to find sexual fulfillment from boredom instead of choosing any other hobby? Does the ease at which we believe we can get sexual fulfillment, virtually, not seem the easy route to go? And on the rare occasion we do get what we wanted, nothing stops us from wanting more – so it wasn’t what we needed instead just easier to do than sitting down and deconstructing the larger issues.

Does anyone else get the impression that some people have updated their Facebook, they have chatted to everyone in their list, gone through their emails, surfed all their favourite sites, all their text buddies are in bed, so now they are bored: so why not look for sex of any kind?!

I have certainly met a few wives and husbands that swing to ‘spice things up’ and under normal conditions swinging would have never been an option for them, but they have convinced themselves that everyone is doing it, they consider themselves adventurous, and certainly it will bring back some fire in the bedroom. These are usually couples with issues they have not addressed but instead chose to pursue sex as a cure to their marital doldrums, midlife crisis of self-value, or simply ‘why not try it, there was nothing else to do’

The number of men who are more open to receiving head from another man has tripled in my sexual life, though they consider themselves straight, they would rather have an anonymous blow job than nothing: and most of them do not consider it sex.

Are we not taking more risks sexually out of boredom or the idea we believe this is what we want to fix how we feel? I keep running into couples and single men/women who are ‘bored’ regardless of their marital status: as though someone told them they had a right to a threesome, anal, or other sexual activity. Phone sex has come back with a vengeance because now we can all slip away with our own private phones; people are seeking out sexting partners – why? Because we have this phone in our hand 24/7 with all this access, why not! Sex would appear to be so easily attainable.

I stay clear of anyone that is unable to accept the natural ebbs and flows of life let alone sexual ones. Most importantly, for myself, I am not here to entertain a man simply because he is bored and could not find anything better to do with his time because I have a few things around here that could use some working on if he is truly that stuck.

I am not someone’s hobby or play thing, read a book, get off the computer and take a fucking walk or something – there is more out there than just sexual stimulation and the more variety you have in your the more attractive you are to others and to yourself.

3 comments on “Does boredom beget whoredom?

  1. kdaddy23 says:

    A lot of “extra” sex happens purely out of boredom; it’s like, I don’t have anything else (or better) to do… so let’s get laid and, usually, it sounds like a good idea at the time… if you can, in fact, get laid. I don’t find it unusual that a guy would get bored, wanted to get a nut… but decided to let a guy blow him and simply because it’s a different way to get off.

    Men probably have more, um, problems with this because sex is pretty much on our minds all the time – and women not so much. Boredom isn’t really having a lack of things to do – it’s about stuff you don’t feel like doing and, no, fixing that broken cabinet, while productive (and it needed fixing) isn’t a cure for boredom; he might be doing something… but it’s not what he wants to do.

    Even having hobbies isn’t a cure for boredom; I’ve got quite a few hobbies and I’m often bored out of my mind even though I’m actively doing them. Sure, sometimes when I get bored, I want to get my cookies crumbled even though that’s not likely to happen but even if it did, I still might be bored afterward (but nicely satisfied).

    The ‘funny’ thing about being bored and wanting to screw is that if the woman says no – and they usually do – all that does is plant a seed of resentment in the man’s head because, duh, one of the reasons why we’re together is because we like having sex with each other… or we used to because, clearly, we’re no longer on the same page about this. It can become a question of if you’re (not you) not going to deal with your man’s needs in this – even if he’s bored – then how are you gonna react if he (a) finds some other chick to stick it to or (b) decides to be a little risky and engage in some sexual act with another guy? A bored man wanting sex winds up between a very big rock and a very hard place and that’s never a good thing…

  2. Pyx says:

    As always a pleasure to hear your remarks. I think that the idle hands idea applies however to men, women and couples. I guess I was thinking out loud: are we so bored with ourselves, each other that we then come up with the idea of something we normally would not?

    I don’t know – sometimes I think way too much.

    • kdaddy23 says:

      I believe that when we get bored, doing something ‘out of the ordinary’ is in order although, sometimes after the fact, we find ourselves saying, “Well, it was a good idea at the time!” Sometimes we get bored – as individuals and as couples – and stepping out of our ‘normal’ box does, in fact, seem like a good idea, even if it’s having sex with each other in the middle of the afternoon with the blinds open… or trying pussy for the first time or letting that bi guy you know give you some head.

      That people get bored is noting new; that couples often get bored with each other isn’t new either. It really becomes a question of being bored – and remaining in that stagnant moment in time – or being bored and, hey, baby, let’s do something we normally don’t do (or, again, stepping out of the box as an individual). I mean, why not? I’m a guy (duh) and it’s like I said – when I get bored, I’d rather have sex than fix that leaky faucet. If you, as a woman, get the urge to get jiggy, well, why not? It’s a rhetorical question because women aren’t fond of just having sex because they don’t have anything better to do; it does, in fact, make some women feel whorish, slutty, etc., and that doesn’t make women feel good about themselves, does it?

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