Sex in the news: Cleveland Ohio

 

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I do not mind the story breaking as I think the families of the girls are truly fortunate to be reunited once more, however what I do not like are the stupid catch titles the media and others come with to sensationalize the story: kidnap den.

Seriously?

The hard reality is reading a story like this and thinking of all the times I spent the night out, away from my safe home aware that this very thing could have happened. Oh certainly we would like nothing more than to believe that such offenses do not happen or should not happen in North America but let us be very logical – this is a human condition and a cultural one: we are creatures capable of violence against one another and against women.

There was no one conversation that I had with my parents that re-enforced the notion that crimes are committed against women because they are women but it was understood. The unspoken truth growing up was that with a cunt we need not ever starve because we always have a pussy for trade. Yes it is offensive but it is also the truth. My parents instead did what most parents do ‘someone could take you’ and filled me with fear and the idea that something I do, simply by being a woman, could make me a victim.

In fact by talking to me like that they made me a victim before I was even old enough to understand and by talking that way they made the law the only impediment to say my brother committing a crime: instead of explaining why it was wrong on a level of humanity it was wrong because the police said so and will come arrest you.

I do not remember them ever, not once, telling my brother that rape was wrong and why it was wrong. I do not recall them socially preparing my brother for a situation where he might have to step in and help a woman or protect her virtue against not only his friends but perhaps himself.

Do you think my brother was told that there is a fine line that can be crossed when a woman has had too much to drink that perhaps he should not mess with her sexually?

I was told to not leave my beer unattended, only buy my own drinks, do not leave the bar with a man I just met, do not drink too much, do not wear that short skirt, do not walk home… fear fear fear.

We should be able to walk down the street at night wearing whatever we want but we don’t because we women realize early on that how things are and how things should be are two very different things but today I am going to start asking parents of young men if they are taking the time to talk to their young boys the same way because I am certainly tired of it being my fault just because I am a girl.

3 comments on “Sex in the news: Cleveland Ohio

  1. kdaddy23 says:

    I drilled these things into my sons’ minds to the point where one of them said, “Okay, Pop, we got it – we got it!” I had to teach them that it was not okay to just take what they want from a woman and drove home the point that they must always be careful, even with the girls who say yes to sex because they can turn right around and say you raped them – and then showed them some news articles where such a thing happened and what the outcomes were.

    My oldest son said, “Ain’t no pussy worth going to prison for…” Yeah, I forgave him for being momentarily vulgar but it proved to me that he understood.

    I have a daughter and I gave her the same “be safe” lectures over and over until she understood that a guy will do anything to get between her legs. While I was aware that I/we were victimizing her before the fact, you do have to put that fear into them; otherwise, they’ll never be on guard for the dangers lurking out there for them.

    It’s sad that we have to teach women how not to become a victim and even sadder that even being forewarned, some women wind up being victims anyway.

    • Pyx says:

      For some reason those are all the conversation that came to mind: my parents telling ME what to not do while my brother just sat there and overheard them. I wanted to call him and ask him if he thought those conversations even perhaps left a subconscious marker that it was a woman’s responsibility to not do something or to not behave a particular way … but then all I had to do was ask my husband.

      “well maybe she shouldn’t” is not what a girl wants to hear but it is how some of us think: women included, I have sat through a rape trial and women are not always on the same gender side.

      Do not get me wrong, I have no delusions that violence is going to go away anytime soon, nor do I have any ideas how to stop it, because on on a biological level we are predisposed to certain things including being capable of violence (some more than others) but when the social conversations we have around each other presupposes a female to be guilty or a victim just by the fact she is a woman… I just wonder if that doesn’t make affect our brains a little.

      Your sons are correct, as vulgar as it might seem, and perhaps we need to be a bit vulgar when we talk with each other about violence. Fear is used in parenting, hell just look at Grimm’s fairytales!

      And there are things we should be afraid of but I look at my husband, my brother and father and have always felt they were a part of a private group with certain privileges that do not apply to me: it didn’t piss me off, nor do I want them or expect them to include me, but it takes a while for a woman to admit that men and women are different- so should parents not raise them accordingly?

      I have not read anything recent to come of this story, but I see the captions in big bold letters on the front page of the news – it sort of pisses me off how we can turn actual tragedy into entertainment – I mean Kidnap Den? Is there someone that actually works to come up with this crap?

      • kdaddy23 says:

        Yeah, they really do pay someone to come up with crap like that; the media isn’t as much about reporting the news as they are sensationalizing it – helps with their ratings.

        I can remember my parents telling me what I thought, at the time, were different things; of course, when I got older I could see how they were related, like how they both ‘warned’ me about oral sex in different ways, two different reasons for keeping it in my pants and the same message about getting girls in trouble. I don’t recall ever hearing the “no means no” message – but I know my sisters did and from that, I gathered that if a girl said no, I’d better not push the point.

        But, in my pursuit of pussy (and dick), I learned more from trying to have sex than I did from what my parents tried to teach me and while I was a really horny little motherfucker, I was a damned smart one; while I never crossed the line with anyone, I know a lot of guys and gals who did and was smart enough to learn from them getting their heads handed to them.

        So, when this story broke, I was kinda shocked because with all I’ve learned to this point, I know men will do anything to get, have, and keep pussy and some dudes are desperate enough to go to the lengths this guy did. I even went as far to guess that he snatched these women and kept them prisoner because he couldn’t get and keep a woman – they’d keep dumping him and all that – so, uh-huh, the best way to make sure you don’t get dumped is to keep them literally on lock-down.

        I love pussy, Pyx… but not so much that I’d be willing to do something that’ll either get me the death penalty or have me rotting away in prison for the rest of my natural life…

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