D: Call me Ninja Master
Me: I am NOT calling you that.
D: why not?
Me: because last month you wanted me to call you daddy-cakes and the week before that was mega something or other. I can’t keep up.
D: You’re just jealous because I am so cat like. *starts walking around on his tip toes*
Me: uhuh. Rigggght.
D: I move like the wind. *he moves around me*
I live in the shadows. *he covers my eyes*
You will be dead before you even know it! * he pretends to snap my neck*
I am Ninja. *does some strange crouching pose*
Me: *laughing* you are seriously damaged.
Hours later I retire to bed and I turn off all the lights as I usually do and a while later he comes to bed.
I hear a loud crash and a groan and I get up quickly to turn the lights on.
There he was feet on one side of the pet gate and his hands, on the floor, on the other side of the gate: think downward dog pose but over a pet gate that has been there for almost a year.
Me: Oh my god, are you okay?! That wasn’t very cat like Ninja Master.
D: Oh fuck off!