Bad boyfriend


PC: so I guess I was a bad boyfriend

Pyx: Yes you were



On Saturday I had written out this lovely angry type entry because I was a bit angry but I did not post it because I had made PC a promise: that he will never read about my ‘feelings’ in a blog entry without having talked about them first. What can I say; I have one of those boyfriends that likes to talk about stuff. Me? I border on vengeance and a serious scorched earth policy that usually renders my partners afraid to even take a piss without my approval.

It was helpful to write it out regardless because I am not the sort to drunk dial people so too I am not the kind of girl that blogs angry. I hate the idea of having to regret something; however since I did talk to him (eventually) I am going to use some of my not published work because it is still valid. I think it is.

The short of it: by 2000hrs on Friday I had not heard from PC and we had made plans for the weekend: tentative Friday but prepared for a Saturday departure. Bag is packed by the door, house in order so my husband has to do basically nothing while I am away and just reheat his dinners.

Saturday’s angry entry: I honestly thought something might have gone wrong at work or with his family so I sent a message to his phone (which I rarely do) to make sure they were all okay: everything was fine, have a cold and no motivation. I was relieved and said as much: no longer worried.

My very sweet and supportive husband then calls me from work an hour later to see if I had left yet so I informed that I had not heard from PC and it is best to assume the weekend is off – the reason I did this was that technically I have not heard from PC say the plans are off. I told my husband that I was pretty sure something important came up and it was not a big deal.

Then things got ugly: he was feeling ________ for me. It was horrible, his platitudes about ‘the job’ and how he was certain PC would explain, I was not to ‘worry’ because PC is a good guy “ you will hear from him soon” he said in a soothing voice. Truths to be sure but I did not want to hear this coming from my husband. “I know it wasn’t your plan but if you will have me, I will snuggle you all weekend” he said.

Was he fucking serious?! Now I was getting annoyed, he is my husband NOT my confidant and we don’t snuggle. I laughed it off explaining to him that I wasn’t upset and that it was no big deal and I would ‘love to snuggle with him this weekend’ but then he offered to take me shopping “I will buy you your own xbox and you can kill stuff at home” at the exact same time I noticed a blinking message on my instant messenger from PC: I really should save this information because the cell phone number I tried to call didn’t work.

That did it. Now I was pissed off.

I clicked off the message without reply: I was not in the mood and it was best to just let it be. I got myself a beer and began to make myself something to eat and as I did things started to pop into my head without any control of stopping them: after almost of two years of fucking me he did not keep my phone number? Was the internet broken? Not even so much as an offline message on messenger – not even an email and surely he has internet capabilities at home and at work: blackberry, cell phone,computer, lap top and tablet. Just when exactly did he know he was not up for this weekend and why wasn’t I told about it? Had I not said a thing when was he going to let me know? WTF!?

I broke my egg yolk by accident and I realized that regardless of what I was thinking I had no right to the answers. I am just a house wife after all; a home economics advisor, and surely I have no life that requires planning and preparations because I can just go back to doing what I would normally so why bother telling me things had changed. I have never said no to PC, I have never so much as said a peep to him in regards to things that might bother me, I remain perfectly agreeable so why would notification even present itself as a requirement: I’m easy. I’m married. I am someone else’s problem. I got myself another beer and went with baked beans and toast. I like my eggs over easy. I sat myself down to watch something in the hopes it would distract my current train of thought but it wasn’t working quick enough.

That last flashing ‘unmotivated’ message was all I got, not a sorry but this weekend is off, not a ‘we will talk later when I feel better’ nothing and the only reason I got that was because I said something first.

First thing this morning my husband asked if had I heard from PC yet but to make it all worse he tried to be funny by saying “heathen [redacted] stand up my wife will he” and that kind of hurt but I again said I was sure something important came up and it was  no big deal. I did ask him to stop mentioning it but this is what I will hear all weekend and he is looking at me as though I got stood up for Prom and it is making things worse! Single guys sometimes overlook that in a way they are dating two people, a pair, not that my husband had great plans but he is surely affected that my plans have changed. I don’t like it.

Saturday PC messages me about some music I had left for him – I replied and went about my day, still no word from him about the plans being canceled. I am a smart woman I know they are but I deserve to hear it and he should say it. Sunday he gets a bit chattier, obviously feeling better and that was great but I was not in a place to feel pity for him. I don’t remember how it came up but I was going to not say something and he admitted he was a bad boyfriend.

I do not like to argue but I also think that they happen and are important to set a standard of resolution: the way we disagree and settle that disagreement speaks volumes to me and it is important in any relationship (friends included). I tend to use humour when I can, yes I was right and he did apologize but I jokingly wanted him to start feeling better. I did not want him to feel too much guilt but he should know what I went through: feel my pain!

I had to watch some crap ass show called DEFIANCE with my husband on Saturday night, I drank enough beer and passed out only to find it was still playing when I regained consciousness – I had decided that night I was in fact in Purgatory. I had died overseas and this was the waiting room to hell. This show is bad, my husband asking me if I had heard from PC every other hour was bad, everything I cooked for him was meat and potatoes … there was no end in sight. The weekend kinda sucked.

PC has my number now you can be assured of that. I had to giggle a few times because he really is sweet and I know he feels bad. I am going to find a way for him to make it up to me – I might just make him sit through DEFIANCE but it would upset me more if he actually liked it.

5 comments on “Bad boyfriend

  1. tispersonal says:

    So yeah, I would have been pretty pissed off too had I been the one that had to call to make sure all was good. I admit it made me giggle a little that your husband taunted you and you got riled over it. I would have too, but it still made me smile.

    I’ve never heard of the show Defiance, but than again I pretty much stopped watching all tv this year. It has been the best decision and I don’t miss it at all.

    • Pyx says:

      I grew up without cable tv – so the policy here once I moved in was: for the sake of my living in America and not going ballistic, we get rid of cable. Took my husband about a year to appreciate it too.

      We purchase tv shows on DVD – so there is a risk involved – the ones we do not like we donate to the library so even the bad ones have a happy ending.

      I can’t believe the stuff that is on TV.. wow. Glad you are proud of your decision, you should be happier for it – I mean certainly I do enjoy some shows but i dont mind waiting: Big Bang Theory being one.

      but this show was BAD i mean it caused me physical pain BAD!!! You know I didnt think he was taunting me but he might have been… i thought he was trying to be all sympathetic and sweet but taunting is more him!
      that bastard LMAO

      These two are going to end up paying me back by building me the most bestest kick ass xbox system ever – games and accessories – i saw a pretty nice shiny silver looking controller…

      • tispersonal says:

        Hahahaha – I love your infatuation with Xbox. So, I should clarify that we don’t have cable, but we have an HD Antenna for local channels and major networks and we have subscriptions to Netflix and Hulu. This is basically for my kids and husband, although he hasn’t been watching TV lately either. Maybe it’s contagious. There are some shows I like and if I am at someone’s house I will watch, but I don’t actively seek them out. I do enjoy BBT and quite a few shows on BBC. Like Top Gear and Idiot Abroad. OMG, those shows crack me up!

      • Pyx says:

        Love BBC! Their DVDs are so expensive.Idiot Abroad – is it making fun of people who travel? It is hard for kids to not have such things when all their friends are talking about something on TV. I raised my nieces without tv – no Hannah Montana for them and I am grateful. After a long day at work who doesnt just want to sit down and chill in front of that! it is so entrancing…

        Back in canada for a very low affordable price and unlimited internet my ex and I used to ‘download’ *ahem* tons of stuff. I miss the big fat pipe so much (the net not the ex).

        We are rural here, I am pretty sure if we could manage a really good internet connection that was not satellite we would do netflix or something too. I do like the idea of picking a show here and there.

        But when I got here he had over 600 channels, all I would do is yell at the TV – or just keep running through the channels and he never got to watch anything. I found most of what was on was largely inaccurate and xenophobic not to mention violent.

        I am sick and tired of full female frontal nudity – where are my balls and penis! then my husband would get a four hour discussion on the sexism and gender bias in American tv… blah blah blah

        Day trader baby had me in a laughing fit with tears running down my face and I almost peed my pants. There was a commercial about salad dressing that had me gagging…

        Okay fine.. he once went to work at 7pm and upon his return twelve hours later I was still watching tv – horrified, in some sort of shock coma (we arent sure) it was a show about redneck weddings… this girl stapled her dress and one couple were bobbing for pigs feet! it was horrible. I suffered severe trauma. I couldn’t look at the people around here the same way. And then came Hoarders…

        I was scared and wanted to go back to Canada. I dont like shows that make fun of people/ailments as entertainment and I really felt justified in the world’s (and my) opinions about America.

        Americans will use sex to sell pretty much anything, even to kids, but no one is actually having it. It was confusing and I didnt like it.

        So he got rid of the 600 channels.

        Oh I know i am going to end up needing a new TV in the other room for the xbox … this is why I haven’t ever touched one till going to PC’s house but no.. he just had to turn it on and put the controller in my hand. I was an arcade girl.

        I have a need to win and to finish the game – I sometimes stay up overnight to finish a puzzle. And the whole power thing, shooting stuff is great!

      • tispersonal says:

        Idiot Abroad is about a guy who is sent on trips around the world by his two friends. He has zero interest in traveling and learning other people’s cultures. He would be considered the “Idiot”. It follows him through the different treks and situations that have been orchestrated for him. It’s his responses to those situations that make the show so funny.
        I totally get about have to many channels; you spend more time skimming through them all trying to find something decent to watch. I like the set-up we have now, even though I don’t use it. Plus it saves me over $100 a month and no one is missing out on anything.
        Americans are the biggest hypocrites when it comes to sex and entertainment. I think sex is a beautiful thing and it should be represented equally. We try and teach out kids that, because the stuff they get exposed too isn’t even anywhere close to reality.
        OMG, I can remember watching that show hoarders before and the following weekend I was going through the house purging everything. Haha I also remember seeing previews for the Redneck Wedding program, shook my head and turned the channel. What a mockery!

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